Whether his relationship with his mother is strained or if he is a true Mama’s boy, your mother-in-law has an influence on your marriage one way or another. Though men generally don’t enjoy the label of Mama’s boy, we can’t deny the fact that most are. Moms have a major influence on their son, whether it is positive or negative. And that is why the relationship your husband shares with his mother will affect your marriage too. Here we list down 4 ways his mom influences your marriage:
1. To Act Like His Mom
‘This isn’t how my mom makes it.’ How often have we heard this? It doesn’t matter if your husband is a 35-year-old adult, it will sometimes feel like you are living with a man child. If they are constantly spoon-fed, pampered, and taken care of all their life, they might expect you to do the same. Chances are your husband is constantly measuring you up against his mom whether it is your cooking or parenting style.
It’s true, we are a product of our upbringing, and sometimes it can be hard to break away from our habits. But if he expects you to constantly clean up after him, maybe it’s time to sit him down and have a discussion. Though they might be used to certain ways by now, they are old and responsible enough to understand when they are being too childish or unreasonable. You don’t have to tolerate his lazy behavior, however, sometimes it’s important to pick and choose your battles.
2. Constantly Running To His Mom
If he runs every decision in his life by her, that’s a red alert. If your man can’t order a drink without consulting her first, you are always going to come second no matter what. Though it is normal to ask for your mother’s advice every once in a while, it’s clear that they have forgotten to prioritize things the right way. If your husband doesn’t discuss his plans about switching careers with you first and instead makes a decision after consulting his mom, know that that’s not normal. After all, he married you and not his mom. And it’s high time to remind him of this simple fact.
3. Not Being Aware of The Changes In A Woman’s Body
Is your man hesitant to talk about periods? Men who were bought up in an environment where menstruation and labor pain was kept hush hush might find it hard to digest the true reality of things. They probably have very little knowledge about it or they might be under the false impression that women have it easy. So, he might not be able to understand the mood swings when you are PMSing or how hard pregnancy and childbirth can be.
4. How He Views Women In General
How a guy is brought up has a lot to do with how he treats the women in his life. If he is brought up in a slightly conservative and patriarchial household, chances are his views of gender roles in society are going to be the same. Especially in our country where men have an upper hand in all areas of life and are still considered as the head of the family, it is quite easy to have the same notion engraved into people’s minds. For example, if a mother treats her son and daughter differently by being more biased towards her son, he is going to subconsciously have the impression that he is superior to his sister.
On the other hand, if your husband is taught at a very young age to treat women equally, then that’s how he would treat you. It is important to know that a healthy relationship between your partner and his mother can have a positive impact on your relationship.
Does your husband’s relationship with his mom affect your marriage? Let us know how in the comment section below.